I've been struggling alot to know how I can prepare for my next steps in life. I feel like I'm currently in this limbo. I feel like I'm floating with nothing to do at this point. There's not much wedding planning to do until closer to the time. I can't start working on ministry stuff until some other parts begin to take shape and happen. My best friend is 3,000 miles away. I've felt useless the past three evenings. I felt kind of depressed and very alone. Although if you know me I love to work ahead on things and prepare, so that's why this time is a struggle. I knew in the back of my head I had not been putting my relationship with God first and it has been on the back burner the past month or so. I get up in the morning read a few chapters out of my Bible, write some things in my journal and that continued day after day. On Sunday I started going crazy and I knew I had to change something. So I started doing something different for my morning devotions and went back to the SOLO book (all my Thrive friends should know what that is!). That helped a little becuase I was able to get out of a rut, but didn't totally help, becuase I still felt like I wasn't accomplishing anything in my free time and in 3 months I know I'm going to be extremely busy. I felt depressed tonight too. I tried videoing Shauna and that didn't work so I was extremely depressed. I decided to watch a movie (Draft Day which I highly recommend if you are a football fan). That movie lifted up my spirits a little and got me pumped for football season coming up! So I was feelign really pumped so I decided so sit down and listen to some recently released worship music and make some new playlists on spotify. Wow, God challenged me in this past 45 min so much. I sensed God was telling me
"You just need to take time to be with me. You are bored and depressed because you are not seeking me in your time. You are bypassing me and trying to fill it with other things. Seek me and you will be fulfilled. You will find me and you will never run dry."
Some more lyrics "I choose to find You in this hidden place. I choose to find you here. I choose to listen. I learn the sound of your voice." So awesome. God told me that when I feel lonely, depressed, annoyed, am struggling I need to take time to be with Him. When I have nothing to do I need to Go to God.That can be a motto through everything in life, "When you question what you are to do next, Go to God."
So for those who read this. I would love prayer so that I can continue to seek God through this time of limbo until things start to take shape for my life ahead. Also if anybody would like to chat with me about my future plans I would be more than happy to do that. :)
You can contact me via facebook, e-mail (abrucrew1@verizon.net), phone, or text (717.585.4099).
-Andi
